After the Honeymoon: Meeting the Ugly Pride Within

Professor Gary Maxey is candid about his own early walk. After he was born again, he lived for months in what he calls sunshine all day. He had peace and joy he had never known. He was too busy enjoying his new life to think about any further need in his heart.

Then, about four months in, it changed.

What he found

In his book on the Highway of Holiness, Professor Maxey describes a gradual and unwelcome discovery. One side of him was a hundred percent for God. On the other side were disturbing tendencies, definitely not like Jesus. Petty jealousy and anger stuck out their heads when he least expected. He suppressed them and kept his mouth shut. He was not happy about them, and he could not stop them.

The worst, he says, was pride. He hated it and did not want it there. Yet deep within he held the unChristlike conviction that he was better than almost everyone around him. He never said it aloud. He could not deny it.

What this teaches

The experience is not unusual. Professor Maxey says it follows a pattern. A joyful conversion captures all attention. Only later does the deeper need show itself. He says the discovery is the start of the Holy Spirit's illumination.

Wesley and Brengle

He quotes John Wesley, who said that in every believer, even after justification, two principles remain, nature and grace. He quotes Colonel Samuel Brengle of the Salvation Army, who described a dark something in the converted heart that wants to get angry, to grumble, to be proud and to shun the shame of the cross. Brengle said the believer hates this something and may even wonder whether he has gone backward.

Professor Maxey's point is that this feeling does not mean failure. Brengle wrote that the man is not a sinner for resisting it. He is a person at a new stage.

The reason pride is dangerous

Professor Maxey says there is probably no greater hindrance to spiritual growth and revival than pride. He adds that seminaries and places of learning are special risks, because the Bible and prayer can turn into an intellectual matter and not a matter of the heart.

Your turn

Write the word you least want to see in yourself. Give God permission to deal with it. Then watch for the situation this week where it shows, and let that moment be an invitation to pray.

Drawn from the teaching of Professor Gary S. Maxey.