Offended Again: How Small Slights Show the Heart

A seat that was not offered. A name missing from a list. A title left out in greeting. Professor Gary Maxey says these small things are often where the heart reveals itself.

What he says about offense

In his book on the Highway of Holiness, Professor Maxey quotes Psalm 119:165: "Great peace have those who love your law, and nothing causes them to stumble." The King James Version says nothing shall offend them. He notes that when the fleshly mind is not yet crucified with Christ, offense is very easy. A million things can trigger it.

His examples

He gives plain ones. You were not invited to lead the choruses or preach. Your name was not on the list where you thought it should be. You were not offered a seat at the high table. People did not address you as you think they should. You were not elected to an office you wanted. You received a query from a supervisor.

Some people complain loudly. Others stay quiet and nurse the offense inside. Professor Maxey says either way the Holy Spirit can reveal the unChristlike thing that needs to be crucified.

Correction as a test

He has watched staff and students become argumentative and ugly when corrected, and not accept correction with gratitude. He lists other triggers, such as being lied about, being criticized unfairly or being told your faults.

Not all anger is wrong

He makes an important distinction. He is not talking about holy indignation at injustice, blasphemy or cruelty. Jesus was angry when he overturned the tables of the money changers. He is talking about fleshly anger that comes from an offended ego, the kind that responds badly when someone crosses, disregards or contradicts me. He quotes James: the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God (James 1:20).

A practical step

The next time you feel offended, pause before you reply. Ask one question: what do I think I deserve right now? Write the answer down. Then ask God if it is true.

Drawn from the teaching of Professor Gary S. Maxey.